"Julia, please clear the table. Dinner is almost ready."
"What?"
Silence.
"You want me to clean up for dinner?"
"Yes," I reply, attempting to conceal a deep sigh. Each "what" drains a little more of my life force away.
I've asked her to clarify whether she's heard me. I told her I need something more than "what." I'd love to know if there's something going on that needs to be reported to the audiologist.
"Can you repeat that?" "Excuse me, I didn't hear you." Or just answering a question/following directions. All of these would be wonderful options. My latest attempt at ridding our house of useless reflex responses is to say nothing when she makes that infernal query.
Still, every day it's "what, what, WHAT?"
At least she doesn't say, "huh?"
***A while back I started a Parent Forum here at BTaC. If you have experience with hearing loss (parenting, personal or professional experience), please hop over and exchange some ideas. I'd love to know how other people figure out if their child is not hearing or not paying attention or just demonstrating a bad habit.***
12 comments:
This is so normal for this age. When I started babysitting 3 years ago for a family their daughter was 6. That was the hardest summer of my life because she wouldn't answer me and would do the whole "what?" thing. Crazy! Now I am seeing Piper start doing it too! I can understand how frustrating it is for you because of Julia's hearing problems and I hope that by talking to her about it you can figure something out. By the end of the summer Gracie was answering me and Piper seems to be doing better as well. Enjoy your Sunday!
When I was growing up (oh, so long ago,) the canned answer for the kids in the house was "in a minute." That must have drove my poor mother crazy. :)
Er... yea, I'm a bit guilty about saying what after I heard someone perfectly (although I usually say, "I'm sorry?").
I think it's probably because I'm bad at thinking on my feet, so when someone asks me a tough question it buys me an extra few seconds to comprehend and respond.
I wonder if that is just a knee-jerk reaction because Josh (my oldest) does that too. I generally reply with, "What WHAT?" (As in, what part of that did you not "get"?)
That happens here too...
On my end, I try to get Tate's (or his brothers') attention before I give an instruction. When I say a name, I want eye contact and a nod or a smile :D
Then I give the instruction.
When I get a lot of "What?" or "Huh?" I ask back, "What did you hear me say?"
I have done this myself too, but not now, just a few years into my deafness. So I'm sure she will stop too.
Because I was always not catching what someone said, for me it was a habbit to always say it. I then use to realise I would catch what people said and still do it, so they would end up repeating and I'd answer to what was said then, or I would say I realise I heard what you said and aapologised, and answer.
Liz
One of my girls went through a stage of saying what? It didn't matter if you were looking at her and saying something into her ear-she still said it. Just a crazy habit that she finally outgrew-so maybe your daughter's 'what' is more habit than need : )
None of my children is "hearing impaired"...however, when I'm speaking, they often experience "selective hearing" in which they acknowledge "Here's $20...do you want to go to the mall?" and completely ignore, "Pick up your dishes and put them in the dishwasher!" They will also say "What?" if they're not sure if I'm actually talking to them...with four teens in the house, it can get a bit confusing!
Wendy
I love your blog and have never been able to comment because I couldn't figure out Open ID commenting and didn't have a Google account.
So this is experimental - trying to comment for the first time (technologically challenged. seriously.)
And by the way? I want a contract with my kids.
so so so (so sweet.)
Oh my. I did it! So happy because you are one of my favorites.
I will now be a commenting fool.
My apologies in advance... ;-)
I love how you put so much consideration into your parenting.
Sig - another reminder to put more into my wife-ing.
LOL I was like Julia since I said what alot
but now I got new hearing aids!
plus they work better than my old one :)
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